Want a happy marriage? Part Two

Having a happy marriage can be one of the most wonderful things that can happen to a person or the worst. If you want a happy marriage you have good shot at having one. The first step is that you want marriage the works. That puts you in the right direction. Now here is something that is very important. Know yourself.
When you know who and what you are, it makes it much easier to go throw life with a positive attitude. Now what does this have to do with having a happy marriage, a lot because you know when things bother you and how to deal with them? When you get in a marriage and you know what you like and dislike it makes it much easier to relate this to your partner. You can also adapt better to things that aren’t exactly the way you want them.

Marriage takes a lot of adapting and if you do it in the spirit of building and improving you relationship with your spouse many wonderful things can happen. When you know yourself you can also know more about how your partner acts and reacts to things in general. You adapted and your partner adapts and guess what you have a relationship that is harmonists versus an antagonistic one.
Pleasing others particularly you spouse really helps build solid relationships. When both partner have a good understanding of themselves and their partner you have recipe for an happy marriage

To put this way by understanding yourself and your spouse and working at helping the other you can a have very blissful life together, but if you only want to please yourself and don’t try to help your partner it won’t be so blissful.
Do this it is easy. If you partner ask you do it as soon as humanly possible. You will find you life and your to do list is much more manageable.

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Want a happy marriage? Part One

It is great to have a happy marriage and we are going to cover how to go about it from before marriage to long into a marriage. We will start with the courtship ritual. That sound stupid how about find the right person. Yes I like that much better.

How do you go about finding the right person? Do you take a test and find out if you are compatible with the person you interested in? That is your call, but I have a storiy that might give a ideas on how to find the right person.

We will start with Betty and George. Both were widowed after long marriages. Each started dating after some time after their lost. Betty found a guy who she thought was a good person so they dated, and then things started to fall apart. Her friend would show up in his golf cloths knowing they were going someplace that need much better dress. The straw that broke the camel’s back was when they were suppose to go to a very fancy wedding and guess what he showed up in golf cloths and said he didn’t want to go. Betty said thank you very much and closed the door in his face... then she got in the car and drove over forty miles to the wedding, which was at a very fancy hotel. Betty felt out of place because she was the only one there that wasn’t with a spouse. Now I’ll get you up to date about George.

The same night went to Betty to the wedding George had a dinner date. His date was a real complainer, nothing at the restaurant was right. George being a normally a very happy guy wasn’t happy with his dates behavior, so right after they finished dinner he took his date home. For some reason George didn’t go home but just kept driving around. He finally ended up at the fancy hotel. He had his cared parked and went to the bar. This was very unusual for George, but something drove him there. He sat down at the bar and had a couple of drinks. Then he felt like moving at around and walked out to the lobby. Well at that very same time Petty walked in the lobby. Petty being a very friendly sort said hello to George. That is where it all began.

Last week Micki and I got a call from Petty and asked if we wanted to go out to dinner with her and George. Of course we said and the evening was planned. We had a wonderful time. By the way Petty and George have celebrated their tenth wedding anniversary.

Petty and George did not have a long courtship. As George said it was fate that they me, so the old meth that you have to have long courtship to have a happy marriage if proven wrong again. There is more to a happy marriage than getting to know your potential marriage partner for a long time. I’ll cover more on happy marriage in part two.

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What do you want to be when you grow up?

We have heard this. What do you want to be when you grow up? Here is a process that I went through. You might find it interesting or you might not. If not go to the last paragraph, but if you want have trip on memory lane keep reading.

When I was a very little boy I wanted to be a cowboy. For Christmas I want leather chaps, a holster and cap gun. I most have been a very good little boy because Santa gave me everything I wanted and to this day I still have the leather chaps hanging in the back of my closet. I grew out of cowboys and moved into being a soldier. All the kids on the block played war games. I know that isn’t politically correct today, but folks we were just kids having fun. From war I moved into music. My mother loved to play the piano. Her and my Aunt Florence would play duets. Aunt Florence loved to play and she would play at a drop of hat. She would play to any one or anywhere, Mon just likes to play for herself. Mom and my Aunt Florence where sisters, but they were so different in so many ways.

Guess what? Mom got me to take piano lessons. I couldn’t have been seven but I gave it my best. The only problem was I didn’t have time to practice, because I was busy playing war or other things. Then at school at in music class the teacher said we could a try different musical instrument. My Dad had a violin, so I brought it to school and started to learn how to play it. I must say I didn’t get very good. Then one day the teacher said they would loan us an instrument of our choice. I chose the trumpet, because we had a friend Eric who plays the cornet, it is like a trumpet, and thought it would be cool.

You still have time to go to the last paragraph. Well I played the trumpet through high school and became the solo trumpet player in the high school plan. Boy did I think I was good. Our highs school was part of six high school league. The League had the best of the best from each school for a big band concert. At that time I knew I was moving out of music to something else, because the other trumpet player were without a doubt so much better than I was I could see there was not a good future for me in music as a trumpet player.

You’re almost done. I went to college and graduated in business. My degree was in management, economics and sociology. All of which are not real sciences.
OK for those of you that skipped the above. We might get older but we don’t have to lose the spirit of youth. Look at a baby that looks like is staring at the wall for a long time, but it is not bored because it seeing so many new things. I want to keep seeing and doing new things. That is what I think keeps us young and mentally growing as a person.
What am I doing now? I am author speaker, consultant and coach. That is a long way from being a cowboy or even business man. You know I am not sure what I’ll be when I grow up.

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Take a walk

I take a walk almost every morning for thirty five minutes or more. You know I look forward to getting outside making my body feel good. There are a lot of good ways to exercise. In the past if I have tried most of exercise. When I was younger I loved to run, but a back injury stopped me from running. Then I tried biking but for some reason it didn’t turn me on. So living in Florida where it is warm most of the time I tried swimming. Swimming was just too boring for me, so I started to walk and I have been walking most morning for years.

What I like about walking is it gives me a chance to think. I do have to watch where I am going at times because I get thinking too much and for get to pay attention to where I am walking. Besides thinking I like to look at the surrounding. It seems no matter how many time I have walked the same route I find new things to see. By the way I walk many different routes so I am constantly amazed. You should try walking; the time goes by so quickly.

Now here are some reasons to walk that are flat out good for you. It is a great for the prevention of heart problems and stroke. Walking is a good thing to do for ant-aging. Not bad for a little time walking around the block. Cancer is a major health problem and walking is a good preventive major for reducing your risk of cancer. If that isn’t enough how about it helps lift you mind and spirts.

You can do anything you want, but to keep active. I chose to walk and that is right for me. You chose something to keep your body and mind in good health. Here is to your health.

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Positive

Being positive is a state of mind. You either want to be positive or not. It is like you either choice to be happy or unhappy. It is your choice. What do you if a see a glass of water that is half way filled? Do you see it as half empty or half full? If you see the glass half empty, maybe you look at the world in a less positive way or if you see the glass as half full you may see the world as a wonderful place. I choice not to see the glass as not half empty but half full, and here is why.

By looking around you, you can see so many wonderful things. You can hear the birds, watch them flying so gracefully and there so many other thing in nature that can help you see the brighter side of life. By seeing the wonders around us it so much easier to look on the positive side of life.

There was a study done on nuns of the Order of Notre Dame of Milwaukee in the nineteen thirties. The researchers studied the nun’s diaries and saw that some of the nuns add very positive comments in their diaries and others had negative comments. What the researchers found that the ones that made positive comments in their diaries lived will past eighty-five and the ones that make negative comments in their dairies didn’t make it to eighty-five. They net result was, those that made positive comments in their diary lived nine years longer than those that made negative comments. There is something to be set for being positive.

All thought are impacting. We have all heard “WE ARE WHAT WE THINK”. So it is important to think positive if we want to have a fulfilling life. It is easy to think of the good things in life, so way not thinks that way? Let’s be positive. Remember if a glass of water has water in it half way up; think of it as half full. By thinking like this you can have that positive attitude that is needed to live life to the fullest.

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March Madness

You’re not a sport fan that’s OK. March Madness if way more than a sporting game, which is basketball. It is a circus without clowns. It’s like watching High Noon. Yes that was a long time ago but it was a great movie. If your are still not interested then read about how they select the teams, rank the teams it make for some interesting reading.

In my opinion March Madness is so much more than the Super Bowl and or the World Series. For football and baseball fans don’t get mad or upset. Read on and you will see my reasoning why I think March Madness is the best and most interesting sport skeptical going.

First you just have to look at where the teams are from. They are from every corner of the United States. So no matters where you live in this great country in the beginning there is more than likely a team playing that is near you. Who doesn’t like to root for the home team?

Second the teams are from every type of school, small large, famous and those that you have never heard off, but the night they play one another they are on a level playing field. The teams have been ranked; meaning some one up in the heavens has said that one team is better than the other. Starting with number one through sixty-four. Guess what, some of the better teams that the ranked high get beat by a lower ranked team. That is what makes this March Madness so crazy.

Lastly it is a sudden death tournament. If a team losses their out, it is that simple. Every night a team plays could be their last came of the season. This makes for great basketball. Every team is playing their hearts out. So whether you like sports or not you can tell you’re seeing the best of the best. It is so exciting
Life is short so go long. Give you life a little long and follow March Madness; you will be glad you did.

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Out to lunch

If you are out to lunch you might not be eating. I use to go out to lunch at a health club and run for forty minutes. Then I would shower eat some nuts and go back to work. In New York City a lot of people go to central park and people watch or just relax. So out to lunch mean a lot of things to different folks.

We all need to eat and we are now told the eating more often in small qualities is the healthiest way to go about eating. Now I am not going to get into diets, because in my opinion we are over informed on what, how and when to eat. So lets leave it at eat moderately and leave it at that.

Out to lunch, in my humble opinion, is a time to step away from the every day activities and re-energies your self. Lets take a look what some people do.
My ninety-year-old friend Bob shuts the door of his office, tells his secretary not to put through any calls and he takes a fifteen-minute nap, then he is ready for the rest of the day. Not bad I might try that, but I don’t have a secretary anymore. Maybe I’ll just set the alarm clock to go off in fifteen minutes after I lay down. What wishful thinking.

Other takes lunchtime to catch up on their reading. They might be reading a best seller, an old favorite, or the latest scandal sheet. As I told you I ran during lunch. What all this has in common is that helps you change your pace of the workday so when you get back to work you can give it your best. That is important, because we as human want to and need to feel what we do is important, thus we might as well do it in the best condition we can.

So when your “out to lunch” use that time to make you the best you can be.

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